Saturday, December 13, 2014

Dear Daisy -2

Ob·liv·i·on əˈblivēən
noun: the state of having forgotten.

Augustus Waters' biggest fear, not mine, I don't believe such thing exists, unless all the people you've met throughout your life died and you're a really bad person. Hard chance.
Anyway, my biggest fear is the chance that all of this being a lie. Not heaven and hell and those stuff, I mean the things I make myself believe in to have a positive life. AKA "You're a good soul, Rahma", "You will be a great person one day", "You were destined to leave a mark", "Your dreams will come true", "You can"...etc

What if they are not true? What if I die normally on my bed, family around me, sobbing on my state, unlike what I dream of, dying like a warrior, full of bruises and war wounds, soaked with blood and holding a flag of peace and tawheed . What if I don't go into a war? What if I was replaced? 

I read a quote before that says "The main reason of failure is the fear of failure" but apparently I can't do anything about it. I just keep moving towards my goal, believing its there waiting for me, (with a 1% chance its false) but I go on anyway, then I die. Either smiling because I achieved what I wanted in life and thinking that I'll finally meet the Greatest God of ever. Or having tears trickling down my cheeks because I failed, miserably. 

I hope it's the first vision, though. Pray for me.

Yours, now and always,
Rahma Fateen

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